Some kinds of lube have a numbing agent, but that’s generally not a great idea to use - you should be able to feel pain so you know if something’s wrong. And as you’re zeroing in on your preferred ingredients, check to see if there are any infusions, like jojoba, that are good for your skin. Try out different varieties to see what works best. Some folks like a watery, runny consistency, while others prefer something that’s more thick and spreadable. Pay attention to the lube’s thickness as well. Some products, like Pure For Men, market themselves as fiber specifically for gay men or for bottoming - but they’re the same thing as psyllium husk capsules or other kinds of fiber supplements, just more expensive. If you’re having trouble getting enough fiber in your diet, a fiber supplement, like Metamucil, can be a good way to firm up your stool and make preparation easier. (But avoid legumes that can cause gassiness, unless that’s what you want.) Yogurt can help maintain proper gut biology. Brown rice is helpful for many people, as are lentils and chickpeas. Avoid greasy foods, red meat, and dairy, which can cause problems for the lactose-intolerant alcohol, which can dehydrate you and sugary snacks.īottom-friendly snacks include popcorn, raw nuts, berries, and lots and lots of water. In general, fiber, raw vegetables, fruit, and whole wheat foods are best for maintaining tidy bottoms. Too much douching can be harmful, but fortunately, you can tweak your diet so that you can be more prepared for action! If you’re doing frequent deep-cleans and you’re feeling more pain or internal friction than you like, it’s possible you’ve gone a little too tidy. Just don’t make a frequent habit of this - once a week is probably about right - because you can irritate your tissues if you’re constantly washing yourself out. Anal sex can present the possibility of a show-stopping mess, and many people prefer to clean themselves out with a douche (which cleans the immediate area inside your butt) or an enema (which goes deeper). If possible, you’ll want to practice a little extra hygiene as well. And talking about your fantasies can be a fun way to get in the mood! Don’t be afraid to go into detail about what you think would be fun to try, from positions to accessories to role-play.
Talking about your hard limits will prevent any unpleasant surprises. To really maximize the experience, you’ll want to be sure you prepare a bit ahead of time, set some expectations, and, of course, practice vigorous consent. In other words, bottoming isn’t always easy - but there are ways to make it easier. And like any sexual encounter, communication is key to avoiding hurt feelings, not to mention physical pain. Bottoming can expose you to certain infections and injuries if you’re not careful. But if you’re open to it and able, there’s great pleasure to be had when inviting penetration, whether you’re playing with a longtime partner, a new friend, or yourself.Īs with any position, there are some challenges to bottoming effectively. For others, it’s a no-go, whether because anal sex can sometimes be painful or unpleasant, because of the unique way their body works, or simply because they prefer other kinds of sex. For some, it’s a gateway to enormous amounts of pleasure and a way to enact deeply held fantasies. Bottoming isn’t everything when it comes to queer sex, but it certainly is something.